VAROLUS MAGAZINE 100TH ISSUE CELEBRATION; WHY DO I WRITE?

Since childhood, reading has been like eating and drinking for me. It was a space where I could leave my own little world behind and dive into entirely different realms—a playground where I had fun. Why was it fun? Because there were no limitations. The world felt smaller, and everything drew closer to me as I read.

So, did this love of reading come from my family? The answer is: No. I had a Turkish literature teacher in middle school who also loved reading deeply. She would introduce us to both World and Turkish literature, assign us various stories to read like homework, and we would analyze them in incredible detail. Thanks to her, I began to see reading from a whole new perspective. Since she knew I was interested, she would bring me extra books. Otherwise, how would I have known about the writings and stories that shaped Turkish and world literature? And I’m saying this not just about the standard curriculum, but for all the extras as well.

This passion continued into high school, and God rewarded me with an extraordinary philosophy teacher. I can even say she influenced my choice to become a teacher. When she spoke, everything else fell silent—even the wildest, most mischievous students in the classroom. She spoke in a way that transported you to different worlds, had you wander around, dream, question—and return to class as a changed person. She turned philosophy into storytelling so beautifully that all the philosophers felt like close friends to me. Of course, my literature teacher was also wonderful, but my philosophy teacher was on another level.

There’s another important point I must mention: her physical appearance completely disrupted my perceptions. She was about 1.50 meters tall, slim, with long hair and features that wouldn’t typically stand out according to conventional standards. But the moment she started speaking, everyone would fall silent. Why? Because she had an incredible tone of voice and a captivating way of explaining things. Her examples were so vivid and her messages so complete that you’d never forget them. I still remember them today.

When your foundations are built like this, your habits become ingrained and eventually define your lifestyle. And then it becomes nearly impossible to change them—because they become a part of your character. Reading is now as essential to me as eating every day.

I don’t know if you’ve experienced this too, but even before I’d finish a book, I’d start thinking about which one I’d read next. When I was a child, we didn’t have the opportunities we have today—just a few bookstores. And since I lived in a small town, I had to wait for the books I wanted to arrive. I was always in contact with my teachers and fellow readers, and we would exchange books after reading them. Today, accessing everything is much easier. Digital platforms offer great convenience. You can now even carry thousands of books with you on an e-reader. Accessibility is no longer an issue. That’s how the change and truth of our times manifest. But I still haven’t fully transitioned to digital books, because I love underlining, flipping back through pages, taking notes, and the smell of a physical book. That’s my habit. What about you—what do you love?

My passion for writing, on the other hand, started much later than my love for reading. Reading was always easier for me. I would jot down small things I didn’t want to forget—sometimes my feelings—but not in the form of a diary; more like a memory notebook, which older generations might remember. I also had a few attempts at poetry. This continued throughout my university life. After starting my career and taking on responsibilities, I had to take a break from many things. Then came family, children, and all the other aspects of life I had to experience.

Until right before the COVID pandemic, I suddenly said to myself one day, “I want to write professionally now—I should take a course.” And I did. I joined a writing workshop and continued for about two years. The friends I made there have become true companions.

Those two years were amazing. We wrote various stories and essays, and we even compiled our stories into a book. After that, everyone continued on their own paths—and still do. My journey with Varoluş Magazine began when I met my dear teacher İsmail Bülbül and was introduced to Reiki. During my time with İsmail Hocam, I learned about the magazine. In one of our conversations, he brought up the magazine and the writings in it and asked, “Why don’t you join us too?” So I said yes. That’s how this journey began for me—and continues to this day.

One of our teachers once said: “Writing is the act of taking out the trash from within oneself.” I wholeheartedly agree. If we write down the things we can’t say or express—without setting limits on ourselves—we’ll feel relief. From that perspective, writing is a form of therapy. And for this reason, I feel deeply grateful to the Varoluş Magazine family and my teacher İsmail, who gave me this opportunity and helped me become more mindful and attentive in my writing.

We are now celebrating our 100th issue. Here’s to many more 100th issues. Congratulations to Varoluş Magazine on its centennial edition. Sending love and greetings.

Arzu Sezgin